A few postmodernist musical pieces

1. “Concerto number 0 for an acoustic ensemble and recursion”

Performance of this piece must consist of single non-zero length musical phrase repeated 2^N times, where N is the ordinal number of this performance, starting from zero.

Following from this definition, no two performances of this piece can occur at the same time. If someone attempts to start new performance while the previous one is still going, the later performance does not qualify as performance of this piece.

To disambiguate in relativist cases, the Southern Pole of Earth, Solar System, Milky Way, should be used as referential time frame.

Author sincerely believes that no two performances of this piece can start exactly on the same moment spontaneously. However, if someone manages to do that deliberately, the resulting performances should be counted as one last performance of this piece.

Additionally, only acoustic instruments can be used for performance. No recording of performances of this piece can be considered to have anything to with this piece. It cannot be called “a recording of this piece” or be used to get acquainted with it. The only valid way to experience this piece is to hear one of its performances first hand.

If any amplification is used by performers, it cannot be considered to be performance of this piece. If, however, someone else uses amplification that does not interfere with original sound, the original performance is still valid (the amplified/transmitted version is, of course, not).

Not understanding some of these conditions has no effect on performance validity. However, for a performance to be considered to be performance of this piece, it must be announced as such.

1. “Solo on zero-stringed guitar”

For this piece, which is performed solo, one must remove all strings from their guitar (or use otherwise unstringed guitar, including one that was never stringed in the first place) and play on it at least for a minute, in the middle of another, collective performance.

Any electric or acoustic guitar (including bass guitars) is fine; however, no sound processing effects should be used. Guitar should not be specially prepared to have additional sound producing capabilities. For the best effect, use a random second hand guitar.

1. “Etude ‘Seven Notes for Planck’”

A major scale played in Planck time. The piece is open for improvisation: there’s no predefined root note and if you’re feeling like breaking canons you can play minor instead.

1. “Longest note”

This vocal piece is/was/will be performed only once, ever. It is the piece in which vocalist continuously holds a note for the longest time.

1. “‘Dialogue’ for a broken violin and orchestra”

One of the more traditionalist and easy to perform pieces, in which orchestra plays march, while solo violinist tries to produce an audible sound from a violin that is broken beyond repair.

If the violinist succeeds, it is not counted as performance of this piece.

1. “Hymn of refusal”

Another vocal piece in this collection. To perform this piece, vocalist must refuse a non-fake marriage proposal and then sing three words: “Ich habe genug” — without thinking about Bach.